I’ve been writing and writing the last few days, and now, the inevitable nightmare of all writers has returned… writer’s block.

I’m stuck on the sentence below. It sounds so amateur and I just can’t do anything to fix it. The sentence is driving me crazy, and I haven’t been able to write anything else. If I could just fix this sentence, I think I’ll be able to continue with the rest of my story.

Could anyone expand this sentence, or modify bits that don’t sound right? (In the story, the car crashes, with the main character – a young girl – and her father inside. The father dies, but the girl survives. This sentence is part of a flashback.)

*The cars span out of control and crashed, the chorus of scathing metal and screams was worse than the pain itself.*
I’m writing in past tense – “The car SPAN…”

I’m also writing in first person, from the perspective of the teenage girl.

I’d like the sentence to be expanded, if anyone can help.
Oops, you’re totally right, I’ve mixed up my tenses. I’ll fix it up. It’s in past tense.
Oh goodness. Sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong with my writing today. There’s only one car.
Thanks for all the advice!! I made so many silly mistakes. Trust me, my writing is usually not this horrific.
- Samantha